My friend recently posted a blog post (here) whereby he quoted from someone else’s blog post which was written in 2007 (here), which quoted from a Her World article written in 2005.
Go figure.
Anyway, the title of the magazine article was “Some men are too cheap for words”, and you can read it in the links provided above.
Highly interesting stuff.
Now obviously I am not privy to the inner workings of the female mind, but I do somewhat gather that being a cheapskate, especially on the initial few dates, is basically a invitation to failuredom.
I think nothing turns a person off more than the sight of someone whipping out the handphone-calculator right after settling the bill to compute the actual cost of each person’s share, right down to the last GST-inclusive cent.
(I’m saying this not just in terms of a dating context, but even amongst friends as well. I just hate to see the calculator being whipped out, period.)
Personally, I think the two best methods are to either say “this one’s on me” (if you and your friends are really tight), or do a quick mental sum and round each person’s share off to the nearest dollar (if you can’t trust your friends enough to pay back the favour during the next meal, ha!).
But I think I’m stepping too much into “friendship” territory here.
Let’s bring it back to the dating context.
My question to the ladies here is this:
Where does a guy being a cheapskate on a date rank in the death-knells of datehood?
How would you take to a guy being a cheapskate?
Is being a cheapskate a deal-breaker for you?
Well, if a guy is so calculative to the extent of whipping out a calculator on the spot to compute “actual cost of each person’s share, right down to the last GST-inclusive cent”, on a 1st date, without asking, it might say something about his character. Maybe some pettiness, lack of generosity?
If there’s a need to go dutch, I think an estimated cost is fine. In general, girls are fine with this as we don’t always expect the guys to pay all the time (well, at least for financially independent ladies). Sometimes, I think we might feel less guilty too if the date doesn’t work out eventually.
haha…who knows, maybe it’s a tactic to indirectly put off the girl!
Dining usually isn’t so much an issue, but from what I read, some of the other stories were really terrible! If it shows in all things, then it’s really not good. Like that Robert.
There are really different levels lah, but I think the worst are those guys who sponge on women.
its nice if the guy pays for the first date… it leaves a much better impression. but subsequently, i think ladies wont expect the guy to pay for every single date .. (coz i’m sure then, he’d prob ask her out a whole lot less!!!!)
it depends on what kind of guy he is. his nature may be generous, but sometimes he may be tight financially (who knows, maybe that doctor has to pay his housing loans, car loans, bills, etc!), i think cannot be too quick to judge.
go by case to case basis. ;)
LF: “haha…who knows, maybe it’s a tactic to indirectly put off the girl!”
Well, true! That’s like a sure-fire way to put someone off, ha!
“There are really different levels lah, but I think the worst are those guys who sponge on women.
Ooh…yeah that’s pretty bad alright!
Estique: “its nice if the guy pays for the first date… it leaves a much better impression.
I thought that’s like a given? At least to me it is, ha!
“but subsequently, i think ladies wont expect the guy to pay for every single date .. (coz i’m sure then, he’d prob ask her out a whole lot less!!!!)
Agreed!!!